The evolution of conversation between Mommies

Pre-Baby: ('C' is my best gal pal)


C: Hey what time you off work today? Want to go shopping and then have dinner after? 
PN: I don't know. I'm still here and it's almost 3. I still have to finish logging in these errors for the trade log. But I will take you up on dinner and shopping. 
C: Yeah, Nordstrom's half-yearly just started today. I can't stand my job, I want to quit. I could really use a margarita tonight.
PN: I hear ya. Me too. I want to quit. Oh the sale starts today. Let's swing by and see what they have.
C: Oh cool. 
PN: Did you see the news this morning? Awful. (talk a bit more about local news and politics)

C: Hey did you hear the news, Brad and Jen broke up.
PN: What? Are you serious? Where'd you hear that?
(more lame, gossip talk continues)


Post Baby (Micro is 3 months old):

PN: Oh my gosh. I hate today already. He's spit up everywhere. I've changed him FOUR times already!! I don't think I can do this.
C: So sorry to hear that. Don't worry. You're fine. He's just a "spit-up" kind of guy. He'll grow out of it. Have you tried holding him up after nursing for awhile? 
PN: Yes. I'm soo frustrated. I haven't even showered. I'm so gross. How are you?
C: Ugghh. 'E' didn't sleep well again last night. We tried moving her to her own bed, but she keeps coming to ours. Her foot was in my back the entire night. I didn't sleep. Today sucks and I too haven't showered. I can't stand myself.

PN: Sorry. One day she'll want her own bed. You're doing good. Try to sneak in a nap when she does. 
(more talking about what our kids are up to and comparing other mom's parenting styles--yeah..we bad)

Post Baby (Micro is 6 months old)


C: Hey. How are you?
PN: Ok. Micro slept till 9am this morning. I couldn't believe it. I didn't know what to do with myself. I couldn't go back to sleep once Fliz (my husband) left. I was too worried Micro would wake up any minute. So I actually watched some t.v.
C: Ooohh. Lucky you. I stayed in the bathroom for a total of FIVE hours yesterday. Hang on. (in the background I hear: 'E' get off the counter. Put that down. No, put it down now. Right now. Little girl, did you hear me?)

PN: what?
C: I was in the bathroom every few hours hoping 'E' would go pee pee in the potty. She didn't. I spent the entire day sitting with her and reading to her. After two hours sitting on the potty, she gets up and pees on the floor. Aiya!! 
PN: That sux. Sorry. She'll get it one of these days. I promise. At her own pace. You're doing great. Keep it up. Wait, hang on a sec. (in background I say: Micro please don't do that. That's not a toy. You'll hurt yourself. Back away sweetie. No, we don't pound on the wall like that)

C: Thanks. But we've been doing this for two months and I'm soo tired. I swear Micro will potty train before she does. ('E', what did I say? Get down. Get down NOW!)

PN: (laughing) He's crawling everywhere and he's super speedy. I have to start baby-proofing. Hey what are you having for lunch today? I still have to shower if I ever plan on getting out of the house today.
C: SHOOT. I gotta go. 'E' has decided to jump on top of the counter. 


Post Baby (Micro is 8 months old)


PN: Hey, what'cha up to? 
C: Nothing. 'E' is watching t.v. and 'Squid' (her other daughter) is in my arms. 
PN: Aww (begins to sing "Precious Moments"). Micro has decided that our dog is a step stool this morning. Hey did you hear about Jon and Kate? (Micro, please don't chase the dog. He's scared of you. No, don't throw that at him. That's mean!)

C: Yeah. I've been watching the marathon episodes and I think they're separating. That's what I think anyway. I mean what else could be "big news". My hair is so "uck". I badly need a haircut. (Little girl, stop and put away your markers, coloring books. Put the caps on all the markers and you can have some ice cream. No, I mean now. There's still some I see under there.)

PN: Wow, really?! Oh they were fighting a lot on the show last time I saw. Anyhoo, I need a haircut too. I can't stand how thick it is right now. What's for lunch? (meanwhile my son screaming in the background as he chases our dog)
C: (still scolding daughter)
PN: Ok, I better let you go. I'll talk to you later.



**notice we talk less and less about meaningful things. Half our conversations are talking to our kids. In fact, when we do get together and have our kids, we barely remember what we even talked about. We spend the entire time scarfing food down and watching our kids. Welcome to motherhood!